When Rick and I were dating we often took long walks together -- at least in the spring, summer and fall seasons. We used this time to get to know one another and to talk about our busy, hectic lives. Rick was a banker while I was learning how to be a most excellent pediatric nurse. We were young and in love so planning for a future together seemed only natural =)
One evening we walked from my little apartment to a tiny street-side park. Located on one of the corners of a very busy intersection, cars were zipping by, but Rick and I didn't hear them. We only had ears from one another. (Aww, love is bliss =) There were comfortable benches arranged around a beautiful water fountain. Our wedding was just months away and our conversation had turned to long-range plans for our future as husband and wife, then later, as a daddy and mommy.
"Rick, I would like three children," I said, "I'd like to have two biological children and adopt one child with special needs." Having seen other nurses at Children's Mercy adopt children who needed families to love and care for them, I thought it would be something I'd like to do, too. I pictured bringing home a small child who was either blind or deaf -- simpler challenges, I thought. I recall thinking to myself that almost any special need would be fine, but that I did NOT want to bring home a child with mental retardation or similar mental deficit. "No way!" I thought to myself. "I'd never be able to hand that!"
I was wary of people with mental retardation. As a child I'd been scared by the actions of one of our neighbor's daughter who happened to have Down's Syndrome. During my childhood years, the 1960's, children with special needs were just seldom seen. In school they were tucked away in special education classrooms -- an almost forgotten group of people. Words like inclusion, acceptance and diversity weren't talked about. My limited experience with those having special needs had created confusion and fear.
Fast forward ten years at which time our family was complete -- our quiver was full, so to speak. Rick and I had birthed two children into this world, and later had adopted a little baby girl. One day I thought about my original declaration about children which I'd expressed to Rick so long ago that one fine summer night before we were married. I marveled at how closely our lives had paralleled that first dream of family. We did have two children and one child with special needs -- only our biological child was the one with a special gift of autism. God had prepared our hearts as only He could do. And He helped me overcome my own fears and prejudices for those with special gifts as well =)
Jeremy does have some mental challenges which was something I didn't want to have to deal with. Along the way I have learned patience, trust and have steadily gained strength from our Creator to move forward year after year. God has enabled both Rick and I to walk with confidence and purpose as we seek the best treatments and therapies for our special son. And He provided us with both Megan and Rebekah -- the very best sisters for Jeremy in this whole wide world. For the gift of these three children I am eternally grateful. Who would have known that the seeds for our family would have been placed in my heart even before we were married?
"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11
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