Kevin: Optimism in the Face of Adversity

     (Permission given by Kevin's mother to share this story . )

     There were lots of kids to play with in our neighborhood.  Our street had less than twenty homes built on it and dead-ended with a picturesque horse pasture complete with an authentic horse shed!   Feeding the horses apples was always a treat.  This beautiful pasture and the Big Woods behind our houses provided hours of entertainment for all of us.  Dad and Mom built our home in 1964 for just $19,000.  Our neighbors bought their homes around the same time and all the kids grew into adulthood together.  The newly planted trees were itty-bitty and most of the homes were three bedroom ranches.  Except for occasional escape of Rusty, the neighborhood (scary) dog, we felt safe and protected on our little block in southern Kansas City. 

     During the summer we had great fun, playing all sorts of games until dusk when our parents began calling us home for dinner.  Everyone looked after everyone else's kids.  It was easy for us to go to someone else's home to play for awhile because the mothers kept each other informed.  We played games like freeze tag, rode our bikes up and down the street, and built many forts in the Big Woods.  In the winter we built snow homes, went sledding and explored the wintry wonderland of the world blanketed in snow.

     I don't remember the first time I met seven-year-old Kevin who lived next door, but it must've been soon after we moved into our new home.  Kevin was a couple years older than me and I remember once watching him awkwardly raise himself to a standing position from a sitting position on his driveway.  Kevin sort of spread himself face down to the pavement then slowly walked his hands backward while pulling his rear end upward.  Was Kevin having trouble standing? I wondered.  Later I asked my mother about Kevin and she told me, "Kevin has muscular dystrophy."  I was saddened by this admission. 

     Two or three years later Kevin was in a wheelchair.  Although he still played with us, we had to modify our play so that he could still be a part of our pretend world.  When we played spaceship on someone's swing set, Kevin was the commander from his space throne.  While we rode our bikes playing "traffic", one of the older kids on the block, Bob, pushed Kevin in his wheelchair up and down our little block.  When we played "pioneers", Kevin was the wagon train leader.  In time Kevin's world grew a little smaller because he couldn't come with us into the woods.  And as Kevin grew older, he played less and less.  I wondered if Kevin was tired, or just growing up and no longer interested in pretend games.

     Forty-three years ago on October 6th, thirteen-year-old Kevin died.  He'd entered the hospital with a bout of pneumonia and expectantly died on the day he was being released to come home.  We were all very sad.  Kevin's younger brother, Dennis, didn't talk much about his brother to us after that.  We, his friends, were sad not only for the loss of our friend, but for the loss his family was experiencing as well.  We grieved for Dennis who was an exceptional brother to Kevin -- it was clear that Dennis loved his brother very much. 

     Because of my time with Kevin, I learned two things:  First, Kevin was one of the most intelligent, optimistic persons I've ever met.  Kevin had a great sense of humor and  always quick to smile.  Kevin didn't call attention to his disability.  Instead he called attention to life and how precious life was.  And people genuinely liked being around Kevin because of his innate optimism.  I learned how to show courage in the face of adversity. 

     Second, I remember staring out our kitchen window watching Bob stroll Kevin up and down our street even during the cool seasons.  These two friends were always talking and laughing together.  I didn't know the word at the time, but I now know that compassion and a deep abiding friendship existed between Bob and Kevin.  God took care of Kevin's needs through others like Bob, and I know Kevin offered others something special in return -- unconditional love and acceptance.  I learned that by giving unselfishly to others one can be touched in a deep and very profound way.

     Now I am watching this same principle play out with our son, Jeremy.  God continues to show His love for Jeremy through others as He did for Kevin.  And I hope Jeremy's friends recognize the unconditional love and acceptance that Jeremy offers in return. 

     "Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit.  Rather, in humility, value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of others."  Philippians 2:3-4